The initial premise of this post was going to be that we are lacking in female criminal defense attorneys (in private practice) around these parts. I was going to bemoan how female attorneys end up in non-litigation positions and feel more comfortable doing transactional work or estate planning or immigration. So, I decided to take a poll on the ABA listserv for solo and small firms, SoloSez. About an hour ago I asked the criminal defense attorneys to holla, and thus far the stats show that of the twenty-one criminal defense attorneys who have proudly called “here”, seven are women. That’s not too bad, right? Two of those women strictly do research and writing for other criminal defense attorneys, yet, they consider themselves criminal defense attorneys as well. Because being a criminal defense attorney is tres cool, so why would you not want to say you are one? I had lunch with another criminal defense attorney the other day. His wife is a lawyer too but does some other sort of work, which he, quite explicitly, called boring. I think he said “if I had to do that work I would shoot myself in the face”. That’s how criminal lawyers feel about what they do. It’s better than yours. Your work is boring. You don’t do criminal? Oh, you are an estate planner? How . . . . .snore. . .
What was I saying? Oh, right. Female criminal defense attorneys.
I want those seven chicks to be my friends. I want them to come out and play. I have, in my mind, fashioned my ideal criminal defense attorney girlfriend and, to further my quest, I am currently recruiting women to join my ranks. So, here’s my personal ad to all women attorneys in the MD/VA/DC area who are not currently practicing criminal defense (read to the tune of Escape – The Pina Colada Song)
If you like wearing a nice suit, and some heels that don’t hurt.
If you’re not into “guilty”, if you have half a brain.
If you’d like visiting a jail cell to see if the snitch is a fake.
You’re the lady I’ve looked for, come with me and try a case.
I imagine drinks in the District at some chic bar, telling war stories, which we will listen to with rapt attention regardless of the level of experience we have. Someone who will let me borrow her lipgloss in the courthouse bathroom or honestly tell me that my butt looks big in that suit. She’ll tell me what fabulous heels are comfortable enough to actually wear all day long and what bag is big enough to hold all my court stuff but still looks good with my petite frame.
She’ll also be killer on cross, write stellar motions and know her way around a habeas. My dream girl is waiting for me. She’s out there, I just know she is.
oh M. you're too funny, I almost gave up finding women in my industry, and then at a tradeshow, I found a couple, don't get to talk to them very often, but that's what happens when you get into a very very male dominated industry. At least we stand out.
That's great, Mirriam, and I understand it. But I hope you will still hang out with the guys some. We like your company.
This was left as a comment on the 'note' on Facebook (this blog gets pushed there). It's by the fearless Cheryl Coleman (who performed my marriage ceremony in Washington Park one Friday afternoon) Had to repost it here so you can see the kind of girl I'm seeking:
(Also pina colada)
Yes I like getting acquittals. Getting evidence suppressed.
And I like when my clients.
Say that I am the best.
But I cant meet you tomorrow noon,to cut through all this red tape.
Cuz Im meeting a client.
who's been charged with a rape
Does this mean you're leaving me?
Just in case, I went shopping for you, but had to post the results on my facebook page, because I couldn't post pictures in the comments here.
God I wish you were in NY. So few, so far between, so often disappointing.
Thank God youse are having so much fun in your profession. What a poem. I've lost my shorts, having my industry sold off to China bit by bit, the next lay-off, the smallest apt. I could find; and locally I'm beaten to death by fund-raising judges, cities (red-light cameras) and State (insurance "responsibility surcharge" my ASSet). NOW I can afford nothing (SHOULD I make car payment, if I can't insure?). Don't worry, the phone/'net should be shut-off after this week.
John, I don't think you meant to write that comment on this particular post, but I'm flattered you read more than this one. I'm sorry you are struggling so, but I don't get the point of your post. That you are hit hard by the economy? Welcome to the club brother. The doors are still wide open. It's a bit tight in here so if you dance like a white guy, try to keep the arm flailing and jumping to a minimum.
Nice site, very informative. I like to read this.,it is very helpful in my part for my criminal law studies.
Nice site, very informative. I like to read this.,it is very helpful in my part for my criminal law studies.
HI
Its tempe criminal defense
tempe criminal defense