I did an interview (twiterview?) on twitter – I know, I know, it sounds really strange but it was actually kind of fun. Anyway, I did this interview with attorney Lance Godard from the Godard Group and one of the questions was what advice do you have for under or unemployed lawyers struggling to find work in these economic times.  My response was that people should not fall into the contract lawyer trap, it’s a dead end, and that lawyers who are under or unemployed should volunteer.  Of all of my brilliant responses, this was the one that was retweeted (which, for you normal people who have other things to do means that other people tweeted it as well).  Lance and I picked up this 140 bit at a time conversation yesterday because of an article that asked whether working a contract job is like working at Burger King, i.e. should you leave it off your resume.  I would link to the article but I have no idea what it was or where I read it.  And, actually, it wasn’t very informative.  It said whether on not you include it depends on where you are applying for employment.  If you went to law school, took the bar and are actively seeking work this answer should come as no surprise to you.  The ‘it depends’ is a typical lawyer answer for “fuck if I know”. Anyway.

Let me back up for the non-lawyer readers.  A contract lawyer is someone who is employed by a temp agency to do work for a (usually) large law firm. The work consists of document review (usually) which means the lawyers (usually licensed meaning they can practice substantive law if they choose to) sit in a cubicle and go over documents (electronic or actual paper) and determine if they are privileged or relevant. You click off boxes on a computer. You might learn some new legal concepts but nothing in depth, just enough to make sure you are accurate when you go through your 1000 documents a day. I have always called it “walmart for lawyers” because it’s not really practicing law.  It’s a job. It pays the bills. I might as well be working at Walmart except at a contract job I get to wear a stupid suit and heels and feel like I’m sort of lawyering.

Mark Bennett wrote about this a while back.  A few doc reviewers posted comments and said they liked what they did as document reviewers and gave some excuses on why it was a good job. The primary thing was money. They want to run marathons, travel and drink good wine. That’s great. These people don’t actually want to practice law. Good for them. I’m talking now about people who want to be called ‘lawyers’.

It’s a con. It’s not really lawyering and that’s the problem with contract jobs. They are truly meaningless. While it is important to pay the bills and put food on the table, you cannot claim to be a lawyer if all you do or have done is document review. I’ve done it. I did it for 6 months last year when I was just getting back to work. I did it for several months in 2005 when I had just moved to Baltimore. I get it. You’ve got to pay the bills. You’ve got a family to feed. So you find a contract job that has overtime because while 28 bucks an hour isn’t great 28 bucks plus time and a half gets you through the week. So you work 50 hours, maybe 60.  At first you think, I’ll do this job and look for something else, or volunteer, or take on a traffic case or two. But you don’t. You sit your ass in that cubicle and hit shift F5 and before you know it a year has passed and while you have amassed no late fees on your credit cards and no overdraft fees on your bank account, you have also amassed no new skills. You have made money at the expense of making money in the future.

Look. The shit is hard. The economy is rough. I’ve been a trial lawyer my whole big girl life.  This is a skill very few people have – give me a file today I can try it tomorrow. I figured when I wanted to go back to work the whole world would be clamoring for me. I was wrong. I’d been out of the game for two years and then all I had to offer was “contract lawyer”.   While it showed I was working, it also showed that after two years at home all I could now do is get myself dressed in clothes not stained in spit-up.  Because there is no actual lawyering involved in document review.  I repeat. You are not practicing law.

Truthfully, it is hard to find a job that pays 28 bucks an hour. I mean, we lawyers bitch that it isn’t enough but who else makes that kind of money at a regular brain dead job? Yes, it’s valuable work for the client that we never meet and who doesn’t give a fuck who we are, but it’s not horribly complicated and it’s not problem solving. So really, we shouldn’t bitch too hard about getting paid four times minimum wage to skim papers and do basic data entry. If you’ve been doing it for over a year and you are still complaining I’m just not gonna listen to you anymore.

So, what do I suggest?  Volunteer. Anywhere. Catholic Charities is a good place to go.  They are always looking for volunteers for their pro-bono immigration panel. I’m sure there are others.  Take a day off from your dead end job – I know you need the money but think of it as an investment in your future, like law school was – and go work at a job that day with a small firm or solo practitioner.  They may not pay you time and a half, or even pay you $30 an hour, but if you get paid anything at a law firm you can put on your resume that you did LAW WORK. Like, you might get to go to court. Oh no! How could I go to court for only $20 bucks an hour when I can sit on my ever expanding behind and hit some computer keys and get paid $28?? That is just crazy talk Mirriam. Can’t you do basic math?

Maybe I can’t. But I went to law school to practice law. Didn’t you?

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